The Theory Behind Imago
Imago relationship therapy was created by Harville Hendrix and Helen Hunt, authors of the national best selling books “Getting the Love You Want” and “Keeping the Love You Find.” The development of Imago Relationship Therapy is based on the theory that you choose a partner, often unconsciously, who is perfectly suited to you based on your own Imago, or image. This image is something that you created from childhood experiences. Your “Imago Match” has both the positive and negative traits of the people who most influenced you early on. Therefore, your Imago match holds the key to helping you finish all of your “unfinished business” from childhood. At the same time that your partner can help you heal from your pain, he or she can also hurt you in some of the places that you are most vulnerable due to your childhood wounds. This is the reason why at times, relationships feel so painful and why they can often seem like such hard work.
Imago Relationship Therapy
Imago Relationship Therapy suggests that your “partnership” is the therapy and that you can learn to use the issues that arise in your relationship for growth and healing. Imago offers couples specific communication tools that will allow both people to feel safe and connected as they learn to talk more effectively about problems.
Conflict in relationships is just “growth trying to happen” but without the right tools, many couples get stuck in “battle” and in the all too familiar “power struggle.” This leaves both parties feeling unheard and disconnected from one another. The pain of disconnection gets expressed by people in several ways, such as in anger, silence, yelling, affairs, addictions, etc. This in turn, results in even more pain.
Imago Therapy offers couples a unique opportunity to change their dysfunctional patterns and to “do it differently”. The Imago therapist serves as a teacher and a coach for the couple as they learn the tools necessary for better communication, deeper connections, and a renewed sense of passion in the relationship. In addition, through the couples’ restored connection and through dialogue, each individual can discover themselves more completely. This provides for the opportunity to grow and heal old wounds, and to live more fully and joyfully in connection.
To find out more about Imago, check out the official imago website www.gettingtheloveyouwant.com